March 2nd 2001

B R I T S . . . .
Well, it’s that time of year again. No, not Crufts, but that huge commercial for HMV that is the Brits.

To be honest readers, ever since my career as an international darts player has taken off, my mind has been solely focused on trying to get the darts slightly nearer to the ‘Bulls eye’ rather than ‘Terry’s eye’. So much so, that the only reason I watched the Brits on Tuesday night was by mistake, as I was actually trying to set the video for Ace Ventura, which was on straight after the news.

However, I’m pretty glad I caught it, as it turned out to be one massive wave of ‘top-notch entertainment’ after another.

Not even the final series of ‘Cannon & Ball’ in 1987 could compare to what I witnessed. I mean, who would of thought those ‘popstars’ ‘Hear’Say’ would be there sounding (and looking) like a bunch of KFC employees after a shopping trip to Asda? And that good old Eninem would turn out to be as scary as a pissed up window cleaner from Swindon who’s only ‘lethal weapon’ is a blunt potato peeler. But, that readers, wasn’t the half of it.

Let’s start with ‘Ant n’ Dec’. Now, these two ‘loveable little monkeys’ are world class presenters…. at 9.15 on a Saturday morning, but on Tuesday night they looked more like two third division footballers who were desperately trying to raise a laugh at an end of season raffle. (Sam Fox and Mick Fleetwood looked like the greatest presenters in history of television by comparison). Any way, back to the music.